Monday, May 09, 2005

I hold these truths to be self evident...

Hi. I'm not feeling especially inspired today so I'm just going to post some miscelaneous things that I happen to believe. I'm sure you do too.

1. People do come back from the dead as flesh-eating zombies. I know this because, as a very young child, I watched Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things. I have known it ever since then.

2. That waitress that calls me "Hon" probably doesn't really mean it. I bet she calls everyone "Hon".

3. Yes, you can live on Coke (as in a-cola). And vodka.

4. It doesn't matter which pair of pants you wear those underwear with, you are always going to get a wedgie.

5. Some things never change. Unless, of course, they do.

6. Even if it has a raw egg or two, cake batter makes a perfectly fine meal.

7. Everyone should get to hit someone in the face with a cream pie at least once a year. It would be a much better world.

8. Your bads deeds do come back to bite you - like a pit bull.

9. If you can't have patience with me you are a ridiculous waste of my time.

10. People who abuse nature should have to live in the desert. Like Death Valley. See how you like it.

That's it for today. Read it. Learn it. Live it.
Kumbaya, baby. Kumbaya

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