Monday, November 26, 2007

Monday! Monday! Some Randomandomandomandom Funday!

Hi.

It's raining (again) and cold. Lots of mud. Lots and lots of mud, mud, mud.

Today is the first day of the hunting season where you can shoot a deer with a rifle. You can use the rifle to shoot the deer. Not shoot the deer that has a rifle. Because they generally don't carry them.

Anyway, I did not go hunting today. Rather, I chose to try to get some stuff done around the house. Which, more or less, is what happened. Lots of little odds and ends.

I have recently decided to take on a new project. I am going to put insulation on the attic floor over the two back bedrooms of our house.

These are two rooms that really don't get used at all. They are just total dead storage. When we first bought the house, I made a concerted effot to fix one of the rooms up as a play room for the chillernts. I painted it, got a cute border of cats wearing cowboy hats, and I bought a nice big carpet remnant and had a carpet place put an edge around it.


***
Crap. I have to stop and do a virus scan on my computer. Hopefully I will be back to finish this later tonight.


***

... crawling back from the tech-trenches ...

I hate viruses. I hate the people that make viruses.

However, I love the folks at Technibble.com as well as the folks at Geekstogo.com because they? Rule. They are all about the free help for computer buffoons like myself.

So the Very Bad Virus has gone away.

The End.

Remind me to add those sites to my sidebar. Props to my geekstas!

*****

Boy, talk about your random posts.

So ... where was I?

Oh yeah, the insulation project.

So anyway, the not oft used toy room is now going to be my daughter's art room. Because I ask you, what can be more inspiring to a young painter than cats in cowboy hats? Hmm?

But, as with everything, there is the pre-project kick-off that involves ... well, usually a lot.

In this case the going out and purchasing insulation part is probably going to be the easiest. Along with the purchasing of the materials, this pre-project kick-off also involves some minor things like patching two 5 foot long leaky areas in the roof - pish! - and removing and replacing the knob-and-tube wiring that currently sort of services the lights (yes, only lights - no outlets in these rooms, baby) while threatening to burn the whole shebang down with the push of a switch. Because the swithches? Are the old push button ones.

Let's see ... is there anything I missed? Oh yeah, picking the ceiling up off of the floor of the once-toy-room-soon-to-be-art-room and replacing that.

And...

there's something else...

Oh. Yes.

Getting rid of the dead bird. Which I think somehow entered through the used-to-be ceiling but I'm not quite sure of that.


*****

And now for something not so completely different.

*****


So, this past weekend I was showing a home to a young professional, his wife and their lovely children

They were looking at a modest house in a not-so-modest price range (yay for big commissions!). While walking through the house, we talked all about some plans they have going on and some plans they would like to have going on.

They have big plans.

I mean really big plans.

Big bankroll type plans.

We chatted back and forth and, as we were wrapping things up, I happened to glance down at the wife's hand.

Other than the Hope Diamond, this was probably the biggest I've ever seen in my life. And, just talking to the people, you know it's not a fake. The rock on her finger probably cost more than all my goats. And my house. Together. Based on that potential dowry, my daughter better get reeeaaaaal inspired by those cats.

Of course I didn't let on that I was mentally calculating just how many goats equal a bazillion karat diamond. I continued on with our pleasant conversation and avoided looking at the hand again - as if it were the Monkey's Paw.



But still, I couldn't help but think ... What would these people think of me if they knew I had a dead owl in the trunk of my car?

Because I did.


This little treasure was something that I had picked up off the road after showing a house earlier that day. Oddly enough, it wasn't far from the end of my drive-way.

I made a quick stop at home after showing properties to my first client and, as I was pulling out of the drive-way, I noticed a furry little lump on the side of the road. At first I thought it was a grouse but after giving it some thought, decided it wasn't. Curiosity got the better of me and I whipped the car around at the next possible spot.

As I approached the little lump, I pulled off to the side, grateful that there were no cars coming in either direction to witness my checking out the road kill.

I walked up to it and, imagine my surprise when I discovered it was a perfect little owl. It must have gotten bopped on the head by a car or something during the night. It wasn't all mangled and it was frozen.

So, I went back to my car to get a pair of leather gloves I keep for occasions such as this, and retrieved my owl. I took him back to the car, respectfully placed him on a sheet in the trunk, slammed the lid and sped away.

The whole rest of the day, this owl occupied my mind. Like the Tell-tale Owl. Hoot. Hoot. Hoot. Hoot. Hoot.

"Doesn't this home have a lovely view?"

Hoot. Hoot. Hoot.

"And this is the master suite with full bath..."

Hoot. Hoot. Hoot.

"The lot size ... GAH! STOP THAT HOOTING ALREADY!!!!!"


Ok, so I didn't actually freak out in front of the clients. Because I am a professional and I don't do things like that.


Anyway, when I made it back home after my long work-a-day, I got a gallon sized freezer bag, put the owl in it, and put it in the freezer. Between the green beans and the pierogies.

I went into the kitchen to deposit my other things and my hubby entered the room.

Me: Guess what?

Hubby: What ... now?

Me: I know what you can get me for Christmas.

Hubby: Oh really? What is that?

Me: Come here.


... walk to freezer ...

Hoot. Hoot. Hoot.

... open door ...

Hoot. Hoot. Hoot.

... grab bag from freezer ...

Me: "Villains!" I shrieked, "dissemble no more! I admit the deed! -- tear open the bag! -- here, here! -- it is the hooting of his hideous owl!"


Actually what I really said was, "I want you to get this taxidermied for me."

Hubby: What is it?

Me: A little owl! Isn't it cute!


So, hopefully by next year, I will have an owl to put on my Christmas tree.





Um ...

I understand that this could very well be the post that cements my weirdness and leads some of you to vow never to read my blog again.

Be that as it may, I have an owl!

Hoot!

This Post was brought to you by NaBloPoMo and Perrier.

10 comments:

Jozet at Halushki said...

Drat the virus! I love stories about your house.

nadzent said...

So...when are you available to come over and fashion one of those playrooms over at our hous, eh?

Anonymous said...

On the owl thingy... you might better check into what kind of owl it is, and the legality of possessing its corpse. Most raptors are threatened in some way, and you may need a permit to keep it, even though it was already dead when you found it.

anne said...

What owl?

Jozet at Halushki said...

LOL! Possession of an owl corspe! That's what you're gonna go down for! See ya in hell, Seestah! LOL!

(Seriously...that might become an expensive owl. Best speak in potentialities. "Let's say..I had a small dead owl. Not that I do, mind you! Let's just imagine for one moment that I had one in my freezer. Not that I have a freezer!")

Anonymous said...

anne, about this fictitious owl. although it may not be totally legal for just anybody to possess some imaginary taxidermied raptor. educators can usually get permitted, for the purpose of "educational material". if you decide you just can't deal with another imaginary "friend", perhaps you may know a "make believe" high school biology teacher, who just may be able to rid you of your ghosts. ken

Jozet at Halushki said...

What about a Girl Scout Leader? Would that count as an educator in search of an imaginary owl?

Or, how about someone who is "homeschooling" their 15 month old? That's an educator, too, yes?

PeetsMom said...

I love it when a post makes me laugh out loud! Frozen owl in your trunk - hoot!

Peggy Sez.. said...

WHEEE!! Surfs Up!..I was checking my blog for comments saw your sister had commented and went to check out her site saw that she said you were losing your mind thought it sounded like fun came here saw that it indeed sounded like it could be happening and now am wondering what happened to the owl and where can I obtain a Cats In Cowboy Hats pic.....;p

preTzel said...

Oh holy hell. I don't know if I'm LMAO harder at the post or the comments between Jozet and Anonymous. ROFLMAO! *hoot* *hoot* LOLOLOL!